SRW: Welcome into my Chambers Chris. I’ve known you for a while now and you’ve always been a real, honest, down-to-earth kind of guy. With that being said, I’m really looking forward to this interview. So, let’s dive right in.
SRW: I’m sure that you’ve heard it all. So hearing this question again might not be a surprise. Have you ever been asked “why is a good looking guy like you still single”?
Chris: Oh boy lol. I get this all the time. Honestly there’s so many different answers to that. Well, first thing I’ll admit to is that I’m a picky guy. It can be a good thing, but also a bad thing. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying I’m looking for perfection, cause we know there’s no such thing unless you’re the Christ lol. I just think it’s about being with the one who’s perfect for you. Knowing what flaws you are willing to take along with the strengths. I don’t believe in settling. Some may call me shallow, but let’s be real. I ain’t trying to wake up every morning to someone who doesn’t do it for me, or don’t connect with. Some people out there are lying to themselves thinking it’s ok to settle. Until, they realize a few things they can’t stand to live with. Equally yoked doesn’t just refer to being with another Christian. It’s also about the relatability and compatibility. That’s just the truth.
Now that we got my ownership out the way, I’ll tell you some of the other reasons lol. You know, I have come across women whom I have been interested in, and some just were not interested. I’ve heard different things like you play too much. Yes I know, I can be a big kid sometimes. I do ramp around. I think that’s why kids gravitate to me a lot. When Uncle Chris is around it’s fun time lol. Some girls just don’t like it though and I understand, it’s not for everyone.
I’ll say this though. My children will definitely love me for it! lol. Another reason is they have concerns about my career as an actor. They fear I may not end up fruitful as an on screen performer and worry that I won’t be able to support a family.
Some ladies may also find a problem with me having a ton of friends of the opposite sex. Although, I know that’s a touchy topic and many people are spilt when it comes to it, the truth is that’s something that most likely will never change for two reasons. One, I’m in an industry where there are a looooot of beautiful women. (I can’t escape that association unless I give up being an actor). Two, I’m a very sociable guy. It’s who I’ve always been. These are just some things.
SRW: What do you think about this statement, “Single Christian women are waiting longer than they have to for marriage because most men in church are not ready.”
Chris: Hmmm. That’s an interesting statement. I honestly think that it’s all genders not just women. We’re living in a different time. I’m not sure if you knew this but our generation was, and is also known as the boomerang generation. Reason being, many people have fallen on hard times financially (with and without degrees) and end up moving back home with they’re parents. So, I think it’s a result of the times we’re living in. You can’t live off of a single income the way our parents and grandparents did. I guess that’s one of the reasons why the Word says poverty is a curse.
Lack of finance has clearly caused a delay of marriages. I do agree that some men in the church aren’t ready for many reasons. But, I believe the same for women too. Some think they’re ready but they’re not. A few get worried about they’re biological clock, etc, but mentally and emotionally some just aren’t ready. I have no gender prejudice when it comes to this topic. A lot of things need to be fixed. Shoot, I might think I’m ready sometimes and then God might swop in and say “hoooold on there sparky!” lol! That was partially to make y’all laugh hahaha! (SRW: I laughed lol) Don’t mind me.
This is one of those statements I believe is bigger than black and white though, and bigger than us. It’s one of those things that is relative based on the individual journeys of men as well as women. Especially, with the times we live in. Thirty plus years ago all you needed to be was a teacher with a high school diploma. Now you need not only that, but a University degree, plus a year of teachers college. Which I’m hearing is now being changed to two (in Canada). So, it doesn’t exactly make it any easier when the rules of the society we live in are constantly changing and made more difficult. Even if Gods word is the same.
SRW: I asked a few men what their thoughts were about women in Canada and they pretty much said the same thing “their materialistic.” I was like WHAT?? Now, there is a fine line between a woman wanting a man to be independent..ie job, and a woman who is considered to be materialistic. In your opinion, what does a materialistic woman look or sound like?
Chris: I can’t say that all women in Canada are materialistic although there are a lot more of them out there compared to 20 years ago. I agree that there is a very fine line between a woman wanting a man who is independent, and one who is materialistic. Definitely. I think one of the mistakes a lot of women make, and ladies hear me when I say this. Is they confuse ambition in a man with the actual manifestation of a financially independent man. What I mean when I say this is, you have to be careful that when you look at a man who appears to not have much going on because of his current finances, that your faith doesn’t get blinded with it. I’m sure you’ve heard the stories of a girl not showing as much interest in a man when he had nothing, but then 2 years later he’s making 6 plus figures and owns 10 properties and a boat and suddenly she starts showing him some love she wasn’t showing before. (SRW: HELLO!! lol)
I think women all across North America can sometimes fail to see the ambition in a man, and lack having the required faith in him which is necessary for her to have so that she can see, and treat him as if the success has already manifested. Don’t get me wrong. Not all women are like this. I know there are a few out there who are not materialistic. However, there are also a lot who are. And it can make it discouraging for men to court.
SRW: Some ladies seem to choose the “bad boy” over the nice guy. (I actually did a Youtube Video on that) Why do you think that is? Are ladies overlooking the nice Christian guy?
Chris: Simple. The nice Christian guy is the hopeless romantic you always dreamed about when you were hoping for that prince charming you read about in the fairy tales to manifest into the one you would call husband. He’s the one who will make sure the candle is lit with 2 glasses of wine poured the second you walk in the door from work. He’s the one who hears you when you say your feet are hurting, then tells you to “go sit and I’ll rub your feet.” He’s the one who’s gonna hold you for as long as you want so you can fall asleep the way you did when you were a baby. He’s the one who knows you are his glory and treats you as such. He’s the one who teaches your daughters how a man should treat them, and teaches your sons what it is to be a gentleman. (SRW: C’mon now, you sure you’re just an actor and not a preacher..lol!), He’s the one that flirts with his wife in front of the kids like they are still two teenagers in high school so that they see a prime example of what it means for a couple to fall in love everyday. Kinda like Cliff and Clair from The Cosby Show. And I’m gonna stop now because some secrets and surprises I gotta keep to myself for the woman who becomes my glory. “wink” lol! But, more importantly than anything else, he’s the man who will always cover you and kids with the blood of Christ in prayer. You can’t expect that from a baby boy most times.
SRW: Chris, women are getting weary and wondering if there are truly great God fearing men out there? What encouraging words do you have for them?
Chris: Oh goodness, yes they’re out there. The good God fearing men are out there. It’s like I said before. We’re living in different times. Some men just might not be ready for whatever reason. You don’t know what has happened in a person life that’s caused them to still be single. Trust me, there are a lot more single people than we realize. Just don’t be eager to settle for anyone because you think all the God fearing men are gone.
Marriage is serious business. Don’t say “I do” out of desperation. If it helps. I can relate to doubt creeping in from time to time as a single man. Especially as an actor in this crazy entertainment industry. Many times I have sat there and thought “Am I ever gonna make it?… Will I ever find a woman I’m compatible with?…. Am I doomed to be single the rest of my life?” Oh and my favourite. One of the biggest lies to ever show it’s ugly head. “Maybe I deserve this…. Maybe I should be single because I’m too this, or that.” Yes those and other things have all entered my mind many times. But I cast it out because I know it’s untrue and I remember God’s promises. So I get it. Believe me I do. So just hang in there.
My advice, enjoy being single while you have it! There is a lot a blessings one can attain being single, that married people don’t have. So enjoy this time and blessing of single hood while you have it. There’s a sermon that Dr. Myles Munroe taught on relationships. I recommend everyone listen to it. It’s called “Kingdom Keys To Successful Relationships.”
One more very important thing I do want to say to answer this question. Probably the most important. People, pleeeeease please please. Get out there and live your life! Some of you think God is going to drop off your life partner in your mail box or something with the Fed Ex guy saying “sign here please”. Excuse my Jamaican accent for a moment, but it Naaaaah guh suh! Uno hear me? You can’t expect anything to happen by staying home all the time. Go out. Do stuff. Enjoy your life! For goodness sake enjoy your liiiiife. It’s called life not death. LOL!
SRW: I am laughing right now because you are all over my Youtube videos.. lol. I asked my SRW subscribers if they were guilty of being a “CWH” single, as I used to be one until I switched things up. You gotta watch that one Chris, cause you hit the nail right on the head.
SRW: Is there ever a time that a woman should pursue a man or let him know that she’s interested?
Chris: Oh wow lol. Ok let me say this. While I strongly believe men are suppose to be the chasers, I really don’t see anything wrong with a woman letting a man know she’s interested. As long as she’s not running him down to no end. If a woman starts running a man down and he’s showing little to no interest you need to stop. In fact, don’t even start. Let him know your interested, fine. But, see what he does next. The reality is some guys out there are shy at first. Doesn’t mean he’s not a man. He just needs a little nudge sometimes. Especially if you’re interested in him. So, I don’t believe anything is wrong with a woman letting a guy know she is interested. Just use your discretion on where to draw the line.
SRW: Finally, how has your relationship with God kept you in your single season?
Chris: The same way He keeps me in every season. Any time doubt or a sense of defeat creeps into my mind, or my heart He tends to show up just in time to deliver a word to me. Don’t get me wrong. I often make mistakes, and sometimes try to figure out things on my own. Even worse, try to force ripe my life because sometimes I want what I want now! So, in no way am I trying to paint a perfect picture here. I’m just saying that in a nutshell with all the mistakes I’ve made, and all the mistakes I’m sure I’ll make in the future, I can take comfort in knowing that no matter what happens God will always be there for me. With Him, He tends to let me grow with the gift of free will. See if I can make the right choices by leaning on His wisdom. But, after a period of time I find that He’ll give me a certain time frame and if I’m not going in a direction that leads to prosperity in any particular part of my life, He’ll step in and deliver me in or out of what He was giving me time to see or understand. It’s like He says “ok I’ve given you long enough. You clearly haven’t seen what I was trying to tell or show you so I’ll deliver you. I love you too much. But try listen to me next time.” (SRW: Ahh, I’m sure many can relate to what you said right there).
Not perfect by any means. But, my relationship with God definitely keeps me in a place of growth, as well as shelter from the storm. He is my strong tower. Even when I don’t deserve it, or fail to seek it sometimes. He always keeps me. Never giving up on me. I’m so grateful for His love.
SRW: We all are Chris, we all are!! Wow, it was a pleasure interviewing you. Feel free to connect with Chris on Facebook or follow on Twitter @Seivright. All the best with your acting career and I pray that He will open many more doors for you. And, while you’re busy living it up, I also pray that you’ll bump into your queen. Who knows your queen could be reading this interview right now..Heyyyyyy!. On that note, I’ll wrap it up with my favourite saying “God Has A Master Plan With Your Name On It!”